Passion – Connection – Intimacy – Love – Sex
What do these words have in common? Nothing and everything! These words are loaded with expectation, anticipation, fear, and anxiety to name a few. The experience we have of these words can be layered with perceptions, opinions, shame, guilt, trauma, fear, and the sensation of butterflies. How is that possible? How are these words so full of so many different meanings?
There’s no doubt that those who have Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) live a challenging life. They may lack motivation to do the basic of tasks, have difficulties with memory, make impulsive decisions, or spend hours researching a new hobby only to lose interest a few days later. What does this look like to an outsider?
Emotional attunement is the process of being aware of and responding to the emotions of another person. Our first experiences of emotional attunement and emotional communication start at birth. Simply put, in our very first human interactions while we are infants, when a caregiver responds to us in a calm and nurturing demeanor, we feel safe and cared for.
Couples come into family therapy for many different reasons. There may have been relationship violation, like an affair or secret spending, difficulty with parenting decisions, increasingly harmful arguments, or a lack of satisfying sex. While this is just the tip of the iceberg for why a couple may seek therapy, the overall goals of couples therapy remains the same: Increase communication and connection while healing relational hurts.
Wanting sex and desiring sex do not always equal. Many people experience a disconnect between the wanting and the desiring at some point in their life. Have you ever said or thought, “I just want to want sex.” This is the most common example of disconnection between wants and desires, and it has nothing to do with how much you love the person you’re with. In fact, the more you love the person you’re with, the more difficult the disconnection between want and desire can be.
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